The Latest Visualizations

These days, I'm enjoying Windows Media Player 10.
I've been used Media player, but that was version 4 or 5. I hadn't updated the software may be about 3 years. Then when I looked a friend's computer's Media Player, I was so surprised for the latest visualizations. That was far beautiful than my old one's. After that I immediately downloaded the latest version of Media Player and now I'm enjoying music not only by hearing, but also by watching!
This is fun.

The Things That Is Far Beyond My Level

There are many books which is far beyond my level.
When I read such books, I'm not even impressed by the contents, but also feel very sleepy. This is a natural way of saving myself. If I suddenly understand those books, I'm sure that I'll feel a great pleasure, but it's also expected a great depression that is the effect of sudden awareness. Because I understand suddenly, I wouldn't participate for my stupidity before. My deep consciousness (unconsciousness) knows everything about me and it doesn't hope my mind to be destroyed, so I guess, it sends me a sleep signal.

After I understand this function of the mind, I no longer felt the need to push myself to understand everything all at once. When the time come, I understand the things once I denied. Until them, I just need to work on the things which is right in front of me.

The Sky

I like the sky,
especially the one with beautiful deep-blue.
When I look up and gaze the deep-blue sky, I often imagine the Space beyond it. Then, I think about the many more unknown things in this universe, and become humble.

Blowing a Kiss

To image blowing a kiss to someone you feel uncomfortable is a very effective way to deal the relationship.
It may be a little hard method for you, but if you really tried, you'll feel lighter and freer.

A Twitterer

Today, when I felt little tired for studying Math, I noticed a beautiful singing of a twitterer.
I was really moved by its voice. I thought, "What a beautiful song... The bird really has such a beautiful voice." I was really really moved by its song, so can't help to thank to the creator of the bird.

p.s.
To the Pope, John Paul II, I express my deep and sincere gratitude.
By deep respect and prayers to others, I learned how to love not only the people around me but also the people who are far away from me.

Children

Today's word;
"Children are the hopes of our future."

Only Light Is There

Yesterday, I completely forgot about writing a post.
Anyway, this is today's word.
"Only light is there."

Beautiful Sound

Today, I went violin lesson which is now held in every other week.
So I heard my teacher's violin for the first time after my ears became somewhat keen (I wrote about my favorite CD's breathing sound, right?). I was so surprised for her violin. I have never thought her sound was that beautiful. I now knew that I really wasn't unable to catch the sound ... But you know what? This might be only a tip of an iceberg. There might be more and more in the world of sound. I can search treasures bit by bit in this goldmine. It's fun.
(Today, I also got only 45 % of my Math's second midterm, and I was deeply devastated for the mark and premonition of failure of this course. But this beautiful violin sound and the joy of discovering gave me a big pity.)

Few Hours of Blue Sky

Today, we had few hours of blue sky, and I heard birds' singing at evening.
My African violet is flowering.
Nature is beautiful.

For Pope John Paul II

One of the most precious person on Earth, Pope John Paul II went to heaven.
I'm not a Catholic and even not a Christian, but I deeply respected him, so I play for his happiness at there.
He was one of the man who worked so hard for Love and world peace.

Both

Like I couldn't love myself completely (because I have some aspects which I don't like), I won't be able to love someone completely.
There are assets and shortcomings in a person. So,I don't have to be hasty to love them all.

The Breathing Sound

Today, for the first time, I heard the breathing sound from a cello CD.
I've listened this CD many times but never noticed this sound until today. It was a bit shock. At first I couldn't figure out the source of this sound. I thought, "What's this sound? ... It's not the sound from cello, not from bow and it's surely not the reverberating sound." I continued to concentrate on this fitful sound, and about the fifth of it, I suddenly understood that this is the breathing, the breathing of this player.
I was really surprised.

One Math Problem

Just now, I solved one Math problem of an assignment.
It took 3 hours to find the answer!
I don't want to solve this problem again. Ever.
(May be I should have move on to the next problem when it became complicated... )

An Airplane Ticket

Today, I booked an airplane ticket!
I'm going back to Japan for June, so, although the main object is to go a dentist, I'm already started exciting.
It's good to see some old friends at there and the nature where I raised. I'm looking forward for food, shopping, and some other new things too!

Not Even 3 mm

I think that my mind doesn't improve even 3 mm (about 0.1 inches) per day.
I can't be a genius in tomorrow. My calculation speed doesn't increase in double by tomorrow too. So I need to be patient to my speed of improvement.

The Two Big Changes in Dreaming

Do you dream in colour or in black and white?
My dreams are in colour.

But when I was in middle school, it wasn't. I rarely saw a colorful one. I still remember the impression when I had a very very colorful dream at the first time. It was so beautiful. And after that, more frequently I saw colorful dreams, and now they are always in colour. It's a wonderful thing to see colorful dreams especially to whom originally saw black and white dreams. It's really like a magic.

And there is one more significant difference I experienced about my dreams, the increase of my will power to control them. At that time when I mostly dreamed in black and white, I often had scary dreams, like running away from something bad, or fallen from a high place. I even remember one dream about a battlefield which I saw at the age of 8. In that dream I was running away from bombs fallen from the sky, and when I just saw a big bomb above my head which was about to hit me, I got up with a jerk. That was a very scary dream... but I never see that much scary ones now, and in other less scary dreams, I am now able to change its pattern. It's like this, when I sensed that a situation starts to go scary, I strongly think, "I don't want that direction. I don't want to be in that situation. Not to be a loser. I will win." Then after I think and behave in this way, the situation in the dream dramatically changes. So I have no more scary dreams.

I'm very grad for these two changes. The first one richen my daily dreams and the later one gave me one believe that I am given the power to change a situation not only in a dream but also in a real world. I assume that this increased will power must be useful even in a real world's hard situation.

A Dream-like World

The words that sprang in my head this morning just when I got up;
"This world is like a dream, so have a very good fun."

To a Suspicious Mind

It's OK to doubt something in which you feel is suspicious,
because it's a natural defensive reaction of humans based on the fear that you might be hurt by others. You think other people may hurt you, because you don't feel love from them. This is OK because people normally can't love someone who you don't know it's character. But it is also true that the strong suspicious sometimes cause problems. So what I recommend is this, not to cling to your doubt too much. You can take a somewhat gentle attitude for the subject, and it leads you to a more peaceful answer for your doubt.

Today, I completely forgot about writing the post before midnight.
Well, tomorrow is a holiday, so I felt a little foolish.

Finding Gems

Everyone is genius of finding one's answer for one's problem.
The answer you've found by yourself through "99% of perspiration and 1% of inspiration" is like a valuable gem.
I expect that the life's value is determined by the fact that how many and what kind of these gems you've found in your life.

An Aura

An aura or a mood of a person is very important,
because it shows the real characteristic of the person.
People always estimate a person's character by checking his/her mood(aura). If someone is always angry, then the person has angry aura; if someone is always calm, then the person has calm aura.
Everyone knows some characteristic of others from their aura. It's like a music. You know whether the person likes pop or rock or classic just by looking. Type of music shows the person's basic thoughts. Then the thoughts determine the one's aura.

Cooking

I'm not fond of cooking.
Only when I'm very tired of studying I like to cook, because it becomes a nice change. So, when I think about supper, I often feel, " That's a bother."
But in these days, there are many things that help the people who are lazy for cooking. I'm very grad and feel lucky to be born in this time. I expect that in the future, if more and more people will go lazy for everyday-cooking, the energy supplements and retort pouch food will get more and more popularity and in the end they may become a staple.
Many people may think that it could be unhealthy and above all it's very boring. But I assume that the many people in the past also must had felt in the same way when something very convenient had appeared.

For Development

Like each individual has its own walking pace, there could be a unique improving pace for each.
I still envy those who has faster pace than mine, but " Even the best man meets his match." and I know there are lots of people who is slower than me too.
I think this is the golden rule for development and evolution, because if there was no one who is above or below than me, I would never be able to improve. To improve one's soul, the existence of souls in other levels is required.
When I noticed this fact, my flames of jealousy became much smaller then before.

Many Other Fun Things

I need to be more patient to myself.
I have very high ideal of myself and my present state is far from that. I can't be the ideal instantly, so I just need walking the path constantly. But it's sometimes too hard to keep watching the goal while walking. I will lose control of myself and get angry for the long way. So the best way to keep constant effort is this, to concentrate on present and not watching the far ideal so often. It's needed to check the ideal sometime to be on the way, but don't need to watch all the time. Then if I concentrate on the present, I'll find many other fun things around the path.

Understand Myself

Basically, no one understand me completely, includes I myself.
Only God understand, and it (I expect god is not a man nor a woman) is inside of me. It lives in the part usually called unconsciousness but the deepest part of it. I don't know how large and deep (or high) of my unconsciousness is, and I'm sure that I never be able to find out all of it within my present lifetime. In 70~80 years, if I'm still living, I'll be 90 ~ 100 years old, but it's sure that I still say "I still don't understand myself completely." If there is a time when I thought that I understand myself completely, then I no longer be a human, but may be a god itself.
I'm on the way to endless learning. And when I know something very important, I feel great joy. It's like a present, the present from God. And I assume that there are infinite presents on the way to understand myself.

By Friends

I am learning a lot from my friends, and I am healed and saved from my soul going to the wrong direction by being kind to them.
Giving love is actually not for other people, but for me to fill myself.

A Child's Laughter

Today, I saw a very very happy seance at a grocery shop.
After I finished shopping and went to an exit, I heard a child bright laughter outside of an entrance door. The boy seems about three years old was having fun with the automatic door, which opens to the inside of the shop as he close to it. He moves towards the door - try to touch, but the door get away from him. This very simple move of the door seems to give him some enthusiasm. He tired many times and every time when the door get away from him, he shrieked with laughter.
By hearing the happy laughter of the boy, I automatically smiled at him and his mother who stood watch from back of him. They seems to be a Chinese family. But no one cared the difference. Every one who heard his laugher gave him back a smile. There was nothing but a pure-happiness.
Happiness is born from laugh, and the purer the laugh the stronger the influence.

African Violet

My African violet (a plant) started blooming again.
This might be because of the morning sunlight which started to enter my room. African-violet doesn't like direct sunlight, but does like bright place. And from about two to three weeks ago, the morning sun stared to shine into my room that faces east. So from now on, the sun shines into my room longer and longer during the morning, and I could see the beautiful red flowers more and more. Only things I have to care is the direct sunlight and watering. (This plant is very strong. This is the first plant I kept alive for about a year and even blooming. I'm grad.)

Today's good things.

Today's good things.
1. I got 30/30 for the Math's assignment #3!
2. I saw three baby bunnies on Uvic campus. So cute!!
3. I'm now searching...
Finish.

Mind Control

You can't change other people's minds,
because you don't have the controller of their minds.
If you try to control them, they will register to it. It's the same as you. You surely will register if a person try to control you. But what's the example of controlling minds? It's the words like this, "You really have slow head, so you have to follow my advice. Otherwise you'll suffer" , or more direct method, violence. Sometimes, some people seem to succeed in grabbing other people's minds. But the minds they grabbed is the only a part of their actual mind. Human minds are originally much much larger and deeper than it appears on the surface. Never you can control the whole minds of others.
Only the controller you have is the mind of yours. And so, only the person you can change is you.

Clean Money

Money is one type of energy.
The energy of which usually called wealth. Most often, it takes the form of round metallic plate or drawn rectangle paper. But there are many other forms, such as check, gift certificate, credit card, or even some curtain goods. The energy can be described by the amount and the state. By state, I mean the cleanness of the energy. People knows the amount of energy money have because it's usually listed. But the state of energy -whether it's clean or tainted- is not known. But people eventually notices the state by knowing the background of the way the money is collected. For example, the money that is collected by a dirty trick is called dirty money, and the money collected by a clean way is called clean money.
And since the way to collect them is the way you planed, the state of money show the personality of yours. The money around you is the manifestation of your thoughts. So you should keep having clean thoughts for collecting money.

The Cause of Bullying

There is the kind of people who actually seems to have fun by bullying the weak.
Do you know why they feel joy? The answer would be this.
They bully the weak because by doing so, they feel superior and it helps to recover their empty pride.
Humans naturally have the tendency to be more cleaver, powerful and beautiful. Everyone has a pride to oneself. But when we see another person who is more cleaver, powerful or beautiful, we feel lost and it brakes our pride. Then from this point, to regain the pride, some of us chose to refine their selves and try to go higher, but some of us go easier way; show the weak to their disgust and get instant glory. However, the latter's glory never last more than a minute, and never actually level up themselves. Rather, it levels down themselves. The lack of this knowledge, keeps them to continue bullying.
But I'm sure that once they realized this fact, they will stop bullying and start refine themselves.

The Sound of Silence

There is a sound even in the dead silence.
In the very late night or early morning, after all the daily sounds such as the sounds from street, refrigerator, TV or radio are taken away, only there left is the very high pitch, metallic, severalfold sound -- the sound of the air. I call the sound as the sound of the air, because I can't find any source and it is heard in everywhere. ・・・May be this sound is the crushing sound of particles in the air. I only guess. But I like this sound.

Time

Time is an enigma.
When I predict there are lots of time, then later, I find out there aren't much left. But when I feel there aren't time, then later I find that there are still some.
Also, when I concentrate on something, time passes so fast, but when I'm in bored, time passes very slowly.
I thought the "speed" of time is uniform, but may be not. At least in my world (the world I am seeing through my mind) , the speed of time is absolutely not uniform. Perhaps there are two kinds of time; one is the time measured by clock and another is the 'time' measured by one's mind. Each may have it's own speed, and the difference between these speeds could be our perception towards time.

The Most Fearful Thing

For me, the most fearful thing in the world is my mind which can create terror.
When I terrified by something, it isn't actually by the thing I see. I feel terror because I look the thing as a terrible thing. If another person see the same thing, he/she may not feel terror. For example, I have a friend who likes snakes. So, for her, snakes are not as terrible animal than I feel. Contrary, I have a friend who doesn't like flying, but I really like it. I like flying and have a dream to fly in a glider. So, for me, flying is not as terrible act than her.
Every person has a different perception for fear and it's determined by one's mind itself. Therefore, there is not such thing like real terror in the outside world. Only your mind decides the thing as a terror.
So, now comes the most important idea; If you can change your mind, then all the fears you have can be eliminated. This is possible, because nobody other than you have the controller of your mind.

Films

We all have many films on our eyes.
The number of films is different by each person, and it reflects the level of consciousness of one's mind. The less the films you have, the more the truth you could see. Then the world appears more beautiful than before. You could see more beauty in flowers, trees, mountains, seas and skies. With these eyes, you also could see through other peoples minds, and you'll find that in every person's deep deep mind, there are diamonds shining beautifully.

Laughing

Do you laugh everyday?
Laughing is also very important for our lives. Without laughing, our lives become very cold and stiff. You know the image of heaven. When you image heaven, there are always smiles and laugh everywhere. The power of smile or laugh can even works in a very dark part of the human mind. Laughing is a main medicine to recover from unhappiness and spend a happy life. So, you must laugh at least once in a day, even you are in unhappiness.

Balancing Toy

Human mind could be compared to a balancing toy too.
If it goes to the right, then next it moves to the left. If it pushed by a big power, it try to balance by moving big.
Then this world could be liken to a space filledｌed with these balancing toys. Those balancing toys are placed close together in a big space, so the movement of each toy influences others. There could be difference in their size, color and its movement. If one moves too much, it could hurt others, or if one moves too small, then it might be collapsed by others.
I hope my movement isn't too big to harm neighboring toys nor too small to be crushed. And I also hope my movement influences others to a good direction.

Prayer for Peace

In these days, this small city, Victoria, is filled with cherry-blossoms.
They are so beautiful, so I can't help looking up them or photographing them.
We, humans, absolutely can't give happiness just by standing on a street, but the cherry blossums can do it so easily just by blooming the flowers.
For the trees itself, these flowers may only be one of the important tool of their vital activity, however when we see their blossoms we feel happy and restrul.
The flowers like cherry blossoms might be a manifestation of God's prayer for peace.

Look from the Other Side

It's so important to think from the other point of view.
If you can really look things from the other side, then it's not an exaggeration to say that all of your problems about relationships are solved. This is the key concept to not only for relationships between humans, but also countries and even other lives in this world.
Perhaps we are all living for this purpose, "To understand everything."

For Cold-calls

One very effective way to turn away cold-calls is to left the phone and ignore completely.
The person will cut off the call as soon as he/she notices there is no one to response on the other side. I always use this way to turn away those cold-calls. This is the very rude way, but the rudeness is, I assume, the same as the cold calls themselves.
...Oh, but even they are rude, it's a good act to be kind to them. So, how about playing a CD in front of the phone? It might be better than just ignore. Don't you think? I'll try this in the next time!

A New Cell-phone

Today, I got a new cell-phone by free of charge!
About a month ago, I got a letter from the company said I need to change the handset because it would stop working by the end of February due to a new net-work system. And they offered another phone for free for the people who have the model. So, I called the company and asked them to send me the new one. Then, today I got the new colour screen model, 'Sony Ericsson T237'!
I'm very grad for this replacement especially because the notice just came to me when I'm thinking about buying a new one. My old phone's battery charger became strange and I was just thinking about replacing the charger or buying a new one. I feel very lucky.

A textbook

Sometimes it happens that I don't recognize the item I seek is already there for me.
In writing this way, it's very poetic, but it's more realistic. For example, today, I got the LPI (Language Proficiency Index) score for the third time, and found that my essay and English Usage score stayed the same from the November's ones. I realized that I need more practice for writing essays to rise the score and to take an English course in coming September. So I started to search about some study materials for this test. ...Then I remembered that I already have the material I was looking. I borrowed two textbooks from a friend who said to me that I could borrow them as long as she lives in here. And these books have been in my room for about a year and I opened only once for the one about essays!!
How am I dumb.
Now I'll seriously study with this textbook and take a better score on the test in three month!

Thinking Level

My brain doesn't stop thinking unless I fall in deep sleep.
I know that even in light sleep, I'm thinking something; only the time when I'm in deep sleep, I'm not thinking anything. I'm amazed by this natural bio-computer's endless power. But even I've been producing tons of thoughts by this amazing super-computer as long as I live, most of them are not great. Most of them are generally the reactions for the real world. For example, when I pass a man on a street, I　automatically produce some comments about him such as "He is cool." "He looks serious." "He looks having short temper." etc. These kind of thoughts are totally not great.
But sometimes, my brain produce good thoughts some which you can read in this blog. If my brain produce more and more good and great thoughts that impress people, I could be a great person.
I expect that a person's basic level is determined by his/her daily thinking level.

Flushing Toilet

I'm very grad that I was born in this modern age that has flushing toilet!
If I were born in only hundred years before where there should be not so many flushing toilet in a house, I had to go a toilet which must be more smelled. Oh, I'm grad for flushing toilet.
(The people in few hundreds years future must say "Oh, I'm grad that I wasn't born in the era using that old system." for flushing toilet though.)

By Yourself

I may have wrote this before, but I'll write again.
"The answer that you find by yourself is the most appropriate answer for you."
The other words from relatives, friends, books, or even the person you most respect are not your answer. These words are only guideposts to find your answer. So even my words in this blog are not your answer. You may use it, but it's not your answer. As long as you use words of somebody, your true power is not recognized. So, you must have find your answer or your words by yourself.
Once you've find, then finally, the words becomes your word and have the ability to influence other people.

Beautiful Weather

In these days, Victoria has so beautiful weather. Also, in day time, it's been getting warm, and cherry blossoms have started blooming everywhere. I feel good and become bright by seeing the beautiful blue sky and the cherry blossoms. I'm sure that most people feel in the same way. The weather or the climate affect so much to human emotions. It's very interesting to know that the basic feeling for weather is same for all over the world.

Photo

A friend send me a page of a web-album.
I looked that page, and felt good. Those pictures were the ones when we went skating with other 7 or 8 friends about two month ago. Although some of my pictures were so strange and gave me the feeling that I don't photograph well, I still felt good. My photograph was always not good, and I always felt uncomfortable to be taken a picture and look at those. But now I don't feel as uncomfortable as before. This might be because of the two reasons. One is that I can now think about my photos in this way; If my image in a picture make someone laugh, then my bad pictures are not as bad I think. And the other reason; I sometimes photogenic when I focus on a camera well. I find this recently. I expect that even those photogenic things can be changed by my attitude.

The Date and Time

Today (for me it's still 22, Feb), I inadvertently forgot to write this blog before midnight.
I always try to start writing before the date is changed, so I can keep one blog per day. You might have noticed that the date and time of this blog is not exactly the time when I posted. It's because these are originally defined at the time when I opened "Create Posts" window. And often, when I write a little long blog, the time is usually shows about two hours before the posting time. For me, it's still take this long to write some posts... Oh well, it's practice, practice.

Jealousy

I'm often jealous of classmates when I got a lower score than them.
That jealousy was very very strong last few years, but now it's getting smaller. This happened because I understood one truth that is no one live life without sufferings. I was jealous because I didn't understand a person deeply; I didn't notice his/her effort or suffering. After I realized this truth, my jealousy getting smaller and smaller. Then as it getting smaller, I could concentrate on myself more.
I hope someday I can transcend my jealousy completely.

One-Tenth

I expect that the ability of a person shown in public is only one-tenth of his/her whole ability.
This is like an iceberg floating on the ocean.
It's often said that an iceberg we can see above the ocean is actually only one-tenth of the whole.
In other words, we can only show one-tenth of our whole ability to the public. So, if you think someone is stupid, then you must need to look the person more deeply, because he must have the ability that is far bigger than just the first look.
So, be careful when you judge people.

Good Food

I went Mexican restaurant today and ate lots.
So that I still can't move.
It's very happy to eat good food.
Simple, simple life.

Learning

There are so many kinds of people in this world.
That's why we can learn each other.
The most important thing is Learning.

A Pure Mind

It is very important to keep having a mind that is pure as a child.
Every great figures whose name have lasted through history has a pure mind.
Perhaps how long you can keep a pure mind is the watershed to be a great person.

A Big Dream

Do you have a dream?
I have a dream, big, big one.
First, I want to build hospitals all over the world.
Then, I want to build schools all over the world.
Finally, I want to build amusement parks all over the world.
Isn't it a great dream?
I am happy to have this dream.

Stories

Today, I went to the library and read 2 novels for 9 hours!
I wasn't going to do that. But anyway, I am the kind of person who is called book warm. I like stories. Everyone likes stories.
But the most interesting story is about this world itself.

A good student

From today, we have reading break for 5 days. But if we include Saturday and Sunday, it becomes 9 days off!!
And just after I entered the holidays, I became a very good student. I got up between 7:00 am~ 7:30, read loudly a thin English book, review or preview Math text book, check the summer courses, make a tentative summer schedule, and practice violin! How good am I! Only if this continues, I can get a high mark for this semester ...but I predict that I'll be lazy again once this break is over.

Short short conversation

Three days ago, there was a fire alarm testing in our apartment building. Each suite was also checked by the person.

About ten o'clock in the morning, just before I go to school, the checker came to my suite.
He entered my room, put a small ladder under the fire alarm, climbed it, changed the old battery to new one, and tested whether it properly work or not. After all was done, he started to talk as he close the ladder.
"When I was little..."
Then He looked at me with admiration, continued,
"I also learned violin, and used the same book. It's the same one, same."
He pointed out the book, 'Suzuki Violin School - violin part, volume 1' on a music stand which was just about a meter (3~4 feet) away from him.
At first I was confused by his sudden talk, but then I understood the point. So I said,
"Really? I just started about 8 month ago."
He moved his eyes to the ceiling, and replied,
"That was about 35 years ago."
I was surprised and laughed. Then he left to the next suite.

I didn't know that the Suzuki method in the violin world was such an long-held tradition, and thanks to the book, I had a really good time with the person who just came only about ten seconds to check the fire alarm. I became very happy after this short short conversation, and it's still warming my heart.
I can't help but spread this happiness to another person too.

The most delightful purpose

The basis of human relationships is the distance between you and the other people, the distance of both physical and mental.

The best distance with a particular person is which you feel comfortable. Either too long or too short will cause a problem, so it's better to keep the best distance. However, the most difficult part of this story lies in this fact; the best distance is always changing. It's not constant. So it's sometimes hard to find the new distance with the person, even if you know the old one. If the best distance was always the same, then there were no problem at all in this relationship. And as you already know, this rarely happens -- In fact, this never happens, if you take a long sight.

The reason why the best distance is always changing is that we are all progressing. But this progress is itself due to the effort to get the best distance to the people around us. So this problem will never be finished.
But the most delightful part of this never-ending program is this; as we progress more and more, we can create great relationships with many many people. We are existing because of this delightful purpose.

Perceptiveness

When we meet a person, we get a first impression from his/her appearance.
Often the impression describes the person well, but sometimes it's reversed as you talk more. But the truth is, we know the person from the first we met, in the unconscious level. We are just recalling the facts. And the speed of the recalling is the ability called perceptiveness. As you understand yourself more, the power of perceptiveness increases.
Then, you can understand people more quickly.

So peaceful

It's very effective to soothe my mind by seeing bunnies at the university.
I'm very lucky to be a student of the university which bunnies like to live. Here is peace.

Uncomfortable people

There are several kinds of people who I feel uncomfortable to talk.
One day, a friend was talking to a person who I'm not good at. I was just looking the two of them thinking like, "I feel little strange with her, but she (my friend) can talk with her very naturally."
At home, when I'm recalling that scene, I suddenly thought, "If my friends covers the type whom I'm not good at, then I don't need to drag myself to make friendship with them... My friend covers them, and some of which (friend's friend) may have a friend whom I'm good at."
I don't need to be hasty for making good relationships with all the people I met. While I can't act kindly, I just let my friends to act.
Then it'll be all right.

Every One

The phrase below sprang to my mind this morning.
"All of the people on this earth, with no exceptions, are loved (by God)."

"mission"

In the essay part of the LPI test on three days before, there was one topic about mission.
The topic was written like this, "Do you believe is there a mission on your on? If you think you have a mission to accomplish in this world, and because of it you were born, write about the mission and the reasons why you think you must accomplish it. (Do not write about going school or getting a degree. Write something specific.)"
I didn't choose this topic, but when I was thinking about this topic just about a half ago, I had one idea about "mission":
If we initially lived in heaven but chose to born in this heavy world, there should be something we wanted to do in "here", but most of us forget about it when we were born. However if someone has strong resolution for the thing, sometimes he/she could remembered a bit about the thing.
Then the people like this call the thing as mission.

For me, this assumption makes very sense rather than just believe in the mission from God. But what do you think?
Is my assumption too top-heavy?

The Mirror of the Truth

Have you ever seen "The Mirror of the Truth" which often appears in fantasy?
I found it several years ago. Do you want to know where was it?
It was in deep my mind, and actually, this was not a mirror, but an pond that has been existed from the first I was born. The surface of the pond, which never ruffle as well as the inside, acts as a mirror.
You may think this is just an image, but you also have the same pond deep in your mind, and once you notice that existence, you can't ignore its reality. The mirror shows you your deep image about yourself which in return the same as your real self.
Your deep image about yourself is constructing you, so it's real.
You think, and you think. You image, and you image.
That's all about the world.

Awareness of ignorance

I now realize that to become more wise is, at the same time, to know my ignorance.
I became very wise compared to five years ago, but at the same time, I realize my stupidity more from that time.
The wisest person in the world could be the one who regards himself as the most stupid person in the world.

"知　無知を知る" by Socrates. How to say in English?
"Wise man knows his ignorance"?

short short blog

Wow... it's almost midnight.
I've been solving Math assignment for about six hours.
And I also have an English test tomorrow. It's LPI. You've have heard this test name several times in my blog.
Thank God, the test begins 1 pm.

To calm confusions

In these days, I have lots of small things to think about it.
And sometimes they make me confuse... but I know some good way to settle this.
The best way is to calm my mind is to take a sleep. But we can't take this solution so often. The next good way is to close your eyes several minutes. It makes big difference especially when you are too confused. Third way is to quite thinking or doing the thing, and pay attention to other stuff.
These are also the functions to keep our mind healthy.

A lazy person

It became clear that I am still a kind of person who becomes lazy when she has time.
The evidence is the non-updated my homepage.
This term, since I dropped Computer Science course at the very beginning, I have some time to update. But it's been almost three month from the last update. I even hasn't studied well for this semester too. I'm getting behind for Math class as well as Physic's.
The lacking ability is this; making a clear goal by myself and act on the goal.
I'll work on this little by little.

A candlelight

Happiness can be given infinitely.
You can give the happiness to other people without losing yours.
It's like a candlelight.
If your light is on, then you can give the light to the next person. Once it's successfully given, the next person can give the light to the next next person. Then the next next person can give the light to next next next person. Then... (go on).
If this happens exponentially without losing any light, I'm sure that it will not take long to light the entire candles in people's minds on earth.
But first, you need to light your candle.

The bad tendency

There are good news and bad news.
Usually mass-media broad lots of bad news and hardly any good news. This tendency is probably common to all over the world. There is even saying, " Ill news flies apace."

But why people want to hear bad news than good news?

Bad news certainly don't make people happy, it always make people sad or angry. And bad news certainly don't create happiness either. Happiness is born from a happy heart. So, if someone takes some action to resolve a problem after hearing a bad news is normally a happy person. Because he is happy, he has the room to think about giving and spreading happiness to the person or the people. In this case, the happiness after the sad news is actually born from the person's happy heart. But this case is not usual. Normally, people who tends to hear bad news are not quite happy and they heard lots of bad news like a bomb, and get the idea for the world as sad, hopeless, and filled with inconsistency.

But even people hate to be in sadness and anger, we tend to give more attention to bad news. Why?
I've got one answer; "Because we want to be happy, we pay more attention for bad news."
This seems inconsistent, but here is the logic.
When we heard a bad news, we feel sadness or anger, but at the same time, we unconsciously feel superiority by watching the people on TV, and the superiority gives us the feeling of plastic happiness.

This comparison is totally different from the one from yesterday's blog. When people start to regain pure energy by comparison, it was actually by these kind of thoughts, "The person's fate looks more severe than mine, but he/she is still trying to overcome it. ...Think back about me, I've never done such effort, even my problem has never been heavier than him/her." The person's mind is filled with respect, but the minds of the people in front of TV, newspapers, magazines usually lack this respect. They instead filled with ego.

This is why the unconscious feeling of happiness obtained by bad news is fake. But, although it can never be a real one, our unconscious desire to be in happy keep promoting to hear bad news.

The happiest person in the world

What kind of person do you think is the happiest in this world?
The person who is the richest? The person who is respected by many others? The person who has a nice family?
My answer for this question is this, "Someone strongly think himself happy anytime, anywhere."
Can you think yourself as in this way? I guess most of you can't. I'm also one of you. Although I often think myself as very happy, this is not "anytime, anywhere."
To be more and more happy, we need to keep seeing ourselves happy. One of the way to see oneself happy is to repeat this phrase, "I am more blessed than 〇〇〇."　The 〇〇〇 part can be anything. It could be someone who seems more miserable than you or other animals, plants, or even some materials. If you keep thinking in this way, you can be happy anytime anywhere.

Nature and Art

Nowadays, many people think that natural thing is the best and artificial thing is bad, due to the serious environmental pollution. It seems that everything we do to live seems to have a bad effect on earth.

One of my friend were really "naturalist." She loved natural forest, and other natural things. Her naturalism was so strong that an artificial garden was also her hated one. She seems having the idea that the natural thing that were totally untouched by humans is the real pure thing, and when humans do something to it, then it is tarnished. I understand this way of thinking because I also sometimes feel that untouched forest as the sacred one.

However, I have one question. When think that the total nature as the best and perfect in the world, then why do we have this "head"? If really nature is perfect as it to be and we are the being that only tarnish the perfection, ...then God shouldn't give human beings this "head." But He gave us this head and because of it we enable to change the nature. Did He make a big silly mistake? But I assume that God is something which has far more smarter head and far more expansive spirit than humans. So, I predict it's very nonsense to think that he made such mistake.

Then if we aren't mistakenly given the head, the fundamental thinking way about nature and art is totally changed. For example, If I were a boss of somebody and gave him a calculator, it means that I wanted him to calculate and be good at it. So if God purposely gave us head which enables us to change the nature, it meant that He wanted us to change the nature and be good at it. In this way of thinking, changing nature is not a sinful act at all, but rather an encouraged one. So, we don't have to feel guilty for cutting a forest and create a new town. But the problem is, we should do this with sincerity to God and other lives on earth. If we think God as the owner of the garden called earth, then we are His gardeners. We should think about His preference whenever we change His garden.

A circle of emotions

Emotion behavior has some rules.
Emotions are one type of function to keep one's mind healthy, and so there is some curtain rules in their behavior, just like an ball.

One fundamental rule is this, "One always choose to be in a pleasant state."
The original feeling of humans is pleasant. So, when it disturbed by something (doesn't matter whether by humans or not), one try to come back to the pleasant state by going through four main emotions. The emotions are "anger," "sorrow," "reflection," "forgiveness." The circle starts with either anger or sorrow. You may first get angry then feel sad, or vice versa, but the later two come in order.
For example, if I get a bad mark on a test, at first I'll think "Why the teacher gave so difficult questions?" or "Why I missed that easy one?" then, "... but, may be I should've studied more..." Then finish with, "Oh, well. I'll do better in the next time." The first two phrases can be both anger or sadness, but anyway, I'll feel both of them one by one. After felt both anger and sad comes the third phrase which is a reflection, and come back to the original state with the forth phrase which is a forgiveness to myself.

Whenever there is a disturbance, one follows this circle, but the size of the circle depends on the magnitude of the disturbance. So when there is a painful event, like loved ones death, it often takes a long time to finish the circle.

Still have a long way to go

One of the favorite Japanese ward is "mada mada," which means "Wow, I still have a long way to go."
When I have that feeling, it doesn't mean I'm tired or feel board for it, but means I become humble. I realize my stupidity and smallness compared to the world's cleverness and greatness. But at the same time I become humble, I also feel my big potential. I feel that I still can be smarter, stronger and more beautiful. This surely feels good when I know that there are still plenty of room to improve.
This great feeling is one of the blessings from heaven.

The first big happiness

Do you know someone who really hoping you to be happy without any other intentions?
The first huge happiness starts from this realization.
When you know that there really exists a person who is really hoping your happiness, you can't help but change your mind.
Your life may have been dark, bitter and sad. It might be filled with sorrow. So you may feel resistance to believe someone.
But when you know the existence of someone who only hopes your happiness, your mind starts changing. You start walking toward light, and start living in real.
This realization actually changes one's life completely.
This power of realization is called "Love."

One message

Several years ago,
when I was thinking about work, I got one message sprang to my mind. That words were certainly came from my mind, but at the same time I felt that they came from a higher place. These kinds of words -inspirations- now often appear while I relax.
Anyway, that words about work were "Work for Love. Not work for money, work for Love."
It's been years, but I am still a student and not even started to work 'officially'. But if I include this blog writing or homepage making as one of my work, am I working for Love?
... May be. Because, besides to improve English writing, now I also want to spread happiness by my writing. Isn't it working for Love?
(I know that this isn't enough working though. Well, one by one, little by little is the rule.)

A relationship

If you are having a relationship which always annoys you, you can quit it.
Often a person who has a kind heart is suffering with this kind of relationships. The person think that "If I quit meeting with him/her, he/she will be hart. So even it's a little annoying for me, I'd better to continue this." So that, the one can't quit the relationship.
It's very kind to think in that way, but even the one itself decide to continue, this kind of relationship never be a happy one. The truth is that if you feel annoying for the person, then the person you are facing also feels uncomfortable to you. If the one realize this truth, he/she can quit the relationship, and can become more happy.
Quitting such relationship is not a bad thing. The relationship was actually a burden; so by quitting it, both the two of you can become more light and can go on to find more happiness.

Give and given

There is one type of people who are loved and respected by many, and I sometimes jealous about them.
But I found one fact.
The people who are loved by many love their friends first. Not the reverse; they are loved by others, so that they love them. They first give smile to others so that others find them as a cheerful and loving person.
From this point of view, there are only two kinds of people in this world, the people who want to be loved and the people who want to give love.
And so, what type do you want to be?
I want to be the one who want to give love.

The most difficult subject

The most difficult subject in this world is mind.
Though I spend so much time to explore my mind, I still don't know all of my thoughts, desires, or intentions in it. And I'm sure that even I spend whole life exploring and understanding my mind, there still be much to left at the point of my death. I don't know how much I'll understand. It may be only 30% of the whole or lower. I don't think I can be able to understand more than 50%.

Everything is in my mind.
All of it.
There is no boundary line of outside world and my mind.

Heaven's way

Things have timing on their own.
They are set to happen on right time and right place. But if you tried to control them by your selfish desire, things usually get worse. However, if you let heaven to control them, things always go well.

But sometimes it's hard to distinguish which way is your selfish desire and which way is the heaven's intention. One way to distinguish is to think the one which seems hard for you is the heaven's. So it sometimes hard to follow. But you can choose the way when you think that you'll regret deeply if you don't follow, and there will be a great pleasure after following the heaven's way.

So, the best way to get the right timing for everything is to be free from your ego. By following the heaven's hope, you'll always get right things in right time and be in a right place.

Misogi - a sacred ablution

I realized that taking a shower is more than just washing my body.
It's also one of the best way to change my feelings.
After the shower, I feel much lighter. It's as if all the minus and heavy feelings such as worries, fume or jealousy are gone with the body dirt.
Then with the purified mind, I can get many inspirations. They teaches so simple rules and many beautiful facts in our mind. I'm discovering these one by one almost everyday, but these are most often discovered while I'm in a shower. (This is much much fun than any other studies.)

And may be because of this phenomena, which seemingly happens to any person in this world, to take a bath or a shower has often been regarded as a sacred ablution.

Became well

I've been so lazy... as you could tell from the shortness of my blog these days.
But at the same time, I've so worried and depressed about my study, especially about physics' lab.
These feelings raised continually like a loop; I was so concerned about my study, but I couldn't stop Net-surfing or other things, then I felt guilty for myself and the feeling of obligation for studying increased. In the end I lost too much time for this silly loop.

......But hey, I still did some of Math's homework and read the physics' lab instruction once for tomorrow.
In addition, I could stop this depressing loop within half a day and didn't bring this to my bed. I also discovered some very important rules when I gave up studying and took a shower.
One of them is this, "Worries make noting but barrenness."
I worried too much, and so lost the energy for study.
(And anyway I am a happy girl who only worries so miner things.)

Wait patiently

When and how our wish to be granted is already arranged.
Only thing we need is to wait patiently with a constant effort.
Then we'll be prepared for that time.

Presents

Today, I was thinking about some presents for my family.
I've been saving points in Japan's largest online moll called "Rakuten," and although it wasn't sure that when the points are good enough to buy the presents, I already started to think about them. I checked the points, and looked the things which I also want for myself.
It was so fun to thinking about presents and how to use the point.

Snow

We again had snow a bit today.
Victoria is the warmest place in Canada, so we don't have much snow. Last time when we had snow was about a week ago, and most of it were melted by yesterday. But today, from about 3 or 4 o'clock, we had sleety weather, and now the ground is slightly covered by ice.
I was going to go out and eat, but we canceled it. We can go another time when we don't have snow.
But snow is beautiful.
I love the snow crystals.

Answers

You know the answer for your problem already.
It's buried in your heart, and waiting to be discovered. If you couldn't find the answer for a long time, it must be buried deep in your mind.
But don't worry, it will eventually come out. And the things, which cover the answer, are also needed items to discovered it. Those are also small answers for smaller problems. You need to work out smaller problems first and then move onto bigger one.

A good listener

I want to be like "Momo (from Michael Ende - Momo)" the best listener I know.
I want to be like her who listens other's talks from the heart and therefore can help to clear the person's mind even without trying. When she listens somebody's worries, she dramatically increases the talker's objectivity by her sincere listening and so he eventually finds an answer for himself while still talking.
This ability is far more great than just taking 100% on a exam.
So, I want to be like her.

A new dream

I'm a beginner violinist.
I just started to learn it from last April, and just stared to learn some real(?) classics.
Today, I found one brochure -- "Victoria Conservatory of Music - String Programs" -- at the Conservatory when I finished practice. The yellow brochure leaped out at me from the set of other brochures on a rack attached to the wall; so, although I already registered a private lesson and don't really need the program information, I took it out. When I went back to home, I opened my backpack and took the brochure and glanced over it. One short section about String Orchestras got my attention. "There are two String Orchestras at VCM(Victoria Conservatory of Music), First Level, and Intermediate, open to students of all ages."
This sounded great. Though that level is much much higher than mine now, if I continue to practice few, or 4~5 more years, I can be a member of one of these orchestras! That would be very exciting. So now I have a new dream, to join an amateur orchestra.

Shaw Secure

Today, I downloaded an Internet security program from SHAW called "Shaw Secure."
SHAW is the largest (I think) cable company in Canada which provides various programs for TV and the Internet.
Just recently, they started to provide a comprehensive Internet security program for free for those who subscribes shaw's high-speed Internet service. (Last year it wasn't free at all -- free for the first six month) And this notice came in just in time to me because my I was just searching a cheap anti-virus and firewall programs to replace with the old one (form another company) which expires in one week.
So, I downloaded "Shaw Secure," uninstalled the old anti-virus program, and installed the new one. It took few hours to finish. But now, there is no more worrying for the expire date!

The same core

I've been wondering why one can hurt or heal others' hearts.
Why we all are affected by others?
Why we all know that some certain words have some certain effects on other people's feelings?
We do know that insulting words can hurt people's feelings regardless of any cultural backgrounds or races. Even we all have unique characteristics and personal histories, we still have some same basic feelings towards other people throughout this world.
Basically, we all like someone who is kind to you, and hate someone who is harsh. This inclination can be seen not only on humans but also on animals too! (and may be on plants.)
Why?
I got one answer recently.
That's because all of our minds, including animals and may be plants, have the same core which is made up from one basic "thing."

Control well

Today, I practiced violin for two hours and studied Math for one and a half hours.
It's very good to spend a day like this. I feel much better than yesterday or the day before yesterday. The feeling after few hours of concentration on one thing which you need to is always good.
One of the key rule to be successful is that you always control your time and not letting your ego or emotion(?) to control it.
When I control a day well, I feel sooo good!!

An important lesson

Yesterday, I made a big mistake. I cut my hair too much!!!
Since I stated to live in Victoria, I cut my hair by myself. And yesterday, I was trying to align it beautifully. I cut the little longer part of the right side of my hair, then left side, back. Check it with mirror. But then I felt a part of the right side was still a little longer than the other part, so I cut; then again cut the left side, back... cut, cut, cut. Then eventually... you know the result. I cut too much! My hair became too short now. I should've stopped it a curtain point, but I couldn't.
Oh well, hair will grow, and with a knitted cap that I'm wearing these days, it looks cute. So this will be another funny story to make someone laugh.
But, oh... how important it is to draw in a line somewhere when doing something so addictive!

The reason

I am here to spread Happiness.
I am not here to spread any other feelings other than Happiness.
I am happy and I want you to be happy.

An intention

Yesterday, I decided to concentrate on English more.
I decided to read one thin English book roundly everyday. First several weeks, I'll read it at least fifteen minutes a day, but when I use to do it, I'll make the time longer. If I continue this until I memorize the book, I must be better than now.
I also dropped one course today, so I can take more time to read other books too. (If I'm able to finish Math's and Phys' preview and review quickly. ... already seems tough though)

News

There are so many sad news in this world.
If you turn on TV and watch news, you'll find numerous incidents, such as murders, abductions, smuggling, corruptions, terrors, wars ... not only man-caused incidents, but there are natural disasters too; wildfire, flood, earthquake, tsunami, eruption, or diseases.
Do we really need to know all of these?
NO.
We don't need to know all of such incidents; especially when we can't even make a person besides you happy. Those news, if you aren't in the place to actually help the people on the screen, don't help your life at all. You may feel pity for them, but that's not they want. You may feel lucky compared to them, but that's nothing for your work. You may feel superior to know the news faster than others, but that's even worse from the point of spiritual growth. Those news never be useful to solve your problems. Those only lower your energy. Those only darken your world. Those only increase your negativity. So in that case, where's the point to see those sad, tragic and upsetting news when you even don't know how to save them? Leave those big problems to the people who are capable of, and focus your problems, your own local problems which you are responsible for. You are capable of solving these. And after you solved the problems, it's enough to create a beautiful harmony around you.
...But if you still feel guilty for not knowing or doing for the people on the screen, what you need is to pray. Pray for them as hard as you want. Then, that's enough for you and the people.

The first good thing

I took out finger tapes on my violin today!!
My teacher put the tapes at the first lesson to show the right place for my fingers to put on, but she said at the last lesson that I can remove them now because the tapes had no longer showed the correct place for the correct sound, and my ears are more correct than the tapes now. But I hesitated to remove. Even I often had to put fingers little higher than the tapes, I still relied on them. I wasn't sure whether I can make the right tones without any mark especially after spending three weeks without practicing. (The practice rooms at the Conservatory were closed during the Christmas break.) So I couldn't remove.
But then today, when I started practicing at the Conservatory (they started working), I felt somewhat annoying for the tapes. So I took them out. Then played one song. I felt... I felt much freer than before. I was able to play right tons without the tapes, and move fingers more smoothly. I was surprised and delighted.
This was the first really good thing in this new year.

Happiness 1

Do you know the secret of happiness?
which is the most important secret of your life?

"Happiness" is one state of your mind.
When you are happy, you feel secure, brightness, and wealth. And the people in the all over the world, each and every individual on this earth, are seeking happiness. There is not even one exception in this fact. But when and what state is happy is different for individual. Some people feel happy when they are surrounded by their admirers, but some people feel happy when they live in quietly. Some people feel happy when they listen rock music, but some people feel happy when they listen classic. Some people feel happy when they stay in one place, but some others feel happy when they travel many places.

Happiness means one thing, but what could make you happy is depends on each. Each individual will define what is the happiness for him.
But there is one common rule in here; "Happiness is the reason of living," in the other words, "It's the source power to live."

Viva comic books!

In Japan, there are tons of comic books, but here in Canada, there is not so many. So I sometimes missed them. But recently, the situation has been changed.
when I went to one of the largest book store in Victoria two weeks ago, I found that there were many more of them than before! I saw about a hundred of them two or three months ago, but now it seems the stock was doubled. The comic books occupied almost one shelf in that store. I'd never expected this, but of course was delighted, and read some of them.
Then, I found one big effect of reading these too. After several hours of reading, I actually started thinking in English! I assume reading characters' English thinking have got really strong influence on me.
I'm not only having fun, but also getting English thinking by reading English comic books! This is very good!!

A Happy New Year!!!

I wish you all have a great year.