A textbook

Sometimes it happens that I don't recognize the item I seek is already there for me.
In writing this way, it's very poetic, but it's more realistic. For example, today, I got the LPI (Language Proficiency Index) score for the third time, and found that my essay and English Usage score stayed the same from the November's ones. I realized that I need more practice for writing essays to rise the score and to take an English course in coming September. So I started to search about some study materials for this test. ...Then I remembered that I already have the material I was looking. I borrowed two textbooks from a friend who said to me that I could borrow them as long as she lives in here. And these books have been in my room for about a year and I opened only once for the one about essays!!
How am I dumb.
Now I'll seriously study with this textbook and take a better score on the test in three month!