There are many books which is far beyond my level.
When I read such books, I'm not even impressed by the contents, but also feel very sleepy. This is a natural way of saving myself. If I suddenly understand those books, I'm sure that I'll feel a great pleasure, but it's also expected a great depression that is the effect of sudden awareness. Because I understand suddenly, I wouldn't participate for my stupidity before. My deep consciousness (unconsciousness) knows everything about me and it doesn't hope my mind to be destroyed, so I guess, it sends me a sleep signal.
After I understand this function of the mind, I no longer felt the need to push myself to understand everything all at once. When the time come, I understand the things once I denied. Until them, I just need to work on the things which is right in front of me.
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