The Breathing Sound

Today, for the first time, I heard the breathing sound from a cello CD.
I've listened this CD many times but never noticed this sound until today. It was a bit shock. At first I couldn't figure out the source of this sound. I thought, "What's this sound? ... It's not the sound from cello, not from bow and it's surely not the reverberating sound." I continued to concentrate on this fitful sound, and about the fifth of it, I suddenly understood that this is the breathing, the breathing of this player.
I was really surprised.

One Math Problem

Just now, I solved one Math problem of an assignment.
It took 3 hours to find the answer!
I don't want to solve this problem again. Ever.
(May be I should have move on to the next problem when it became complicated... )

An Airplane Ticket

Today, I booked an airplane ticket!
I'm going back to Japan for June, so, although the main object is to go a dentist, I'm already started exciting.
It's good to see some old friends at there and the nature where I raised. I'm looking forward for food, shopping, and some other new things too!

Not Even 3 mm

I think that my mind doesn't improve even 3 mm (about 0.1 inches) per day.
I can't be a genius in tomorrow. My calculation speed doesn't increase in double by tomorrow too. So I need to be patient to my speed of improvement.

The Two Big Changes in Dreaming

Do you dream in colour or in black and white?
My dreams are in colour.

But when I was in middle school, it wasn't. I rarely saw a colorful one. I still remember the impression when I had a very very colorful dream at the first time. It was so beautiful. And after that, more frequently I saw colorful dreams, and now they are always in colour. It's a wonderful thing to see colorful dreams especially to whom originally saw black and white dreams. It's really like a magic.

And there is one more significant difference I experienced about my dreams, the increase of my will power to control them. At that time when I mostly dreamed in black and white, I often had scary dreams, like running away from something bad, or fallen from a high place. I even remember one dream about a battlefield which I saw at the age of 8. In that dream I was running away from bombs fallen from the sky, and when I just saw a big bomb above my head which was about to hit me, I got up with a jerk. That was a very scary dream... but I never see that much scary ones now, and in other less scary dreams, I am now able to change its pattern. It's like this, when I sensed that a situation starts to go scary, I strongly think, "I don't want that direction. I don't want to be in that situation. Not to be a loser. I will win." Then after I think and behave in this way, the situation in the dream dramatically changes. So I have no more scary dreams.

I'm very grad for these two changes. The first one richen my daily dreams and the later one gave me one believe that I am given the power to change a situation not only in a dream but also in a real world. I assume that this increased will power must be useful even in a real world's hard situation.

A Dream-like World

The words that sprang in my head this morning just when I got up;
"This world is like a dream, so have a very good fun."

To a Suspicious Mind

It's OK to doubt something in which you feel is suspicious,
because it's a natural defensive reaction of humans based on the fear that you might be hurt by others. You think other people may hurt you, because you don't feel love from them. This is OK because people normally can't love someone who you don't know it's character. But it is also true that the strong suspicious sometimes cause problems. So what I recommend is this, not to cling to your doubt too much. You can take a somewhat gentle attitude for the subject, and it leads you to a more peaceful answer for your doubt.

Today, I completely forgot about writing the post before midnight.
Well, tomorrow is a holiday, so I felt a little foolish.

Finding Gems

Everyone is genius of finding one's answer for one's problem.
The answer you've found by yourself through "99% of perspiration and 1% of inspiration" is like a valuable gem.
I expect that the life's value is determined by the fact that how many and what kind of these gems you've found in your life.

An Aura

An aura or a mood of a person is very important,
because it shows the real characteristic of the person.
People always estimate a person's character by checking his/her mood(aura). If someone is always angry, then the person has angry aura; if someone is always calm, then the person has calm aura.
Everyone knows some characteristic of others from their aura. It's like a music. You know whether the person likes pop or rock or classic just by looking. Type of music shows the person's basic thoughts. Then the thoughts determine the one's aura.

Cooking

I'm not fond of cooking.
Only when I'm very tired of studying I like to cook, because it becomes a nice change. So, when I think about supper, I often feel, " That's a bother."
But in these days, there are many things that help the people who are lazy for cooking. I'm very grad and feel lucky to be born in this time. I expect that in the future, if more and more people will go lazy for everyday-cooking, the energy supplements and retort pouch food will get more and more popularity and in the end they may become a staple.
Many people may think that it could be unhealthy and above all it's very boring. But I assume that the many people in the past also must had felt in the same way when something very convenient had appeared.

For Development

Like each individual has its own walking pace, there could be a unique improving pace for each.
I still envy those who has faster pace than mine, but " Even the best man meets his match." and I know there are lots of people who is slower than me too.
I think this is the golden rule for development and evolution, because if there was no one who is above or below than me, I would never be able to improve. To improve one's soul, the existence of souls in other levels is required.
When I noticed this fact, my flames of jealousy became much smaller then before.

Many Other Fun Things

I need to be more patient to myself.
I have very high ideal of myself and my present state is far from that. I can't be the ideal instantly, so I just need walking the path constantly. But it's sometimes too hard to keep watching the goal while walking. I will lose control of myself and get angry for the long way. So the best way to keep constant effort is this, to concentrate on present and not watching the far ideal so often. It's needed to check the ideal sometime to be on the way, but don't need to watch all the time. Then if I concentrate on the present, I'll find many other fun things around the path.

Understand Myself

Basically, no one understand me completely, includes I myself.
Only God understand, and it (I expect god is not a man nor a woman) is inside of me. It lives in the part usually called unconsciousness but the deepest part of it. I don't know how large and deep (or high) of my unconsciousness is, and I'm sure that I never be able to find out all of it within my present lifetime. In 70~80 years, if I'm still living, I'll be 90 ~ 100 years old, but it's sure that I still say "I still don't understand myself completely." If there is a time when I thought that I understand myself completely, then I no longer be a human, but may be a god itself.
I'm on the way to endless learning. And when I know something very important, I feel great joy. It's like a present, the present from God. And I assume that there are infinite presents on the way to understand myself.

By Friends

I am learning a lot from my friends, and I am healed and saved from my soul going to the wrong direction by being kind to them.
Giving love is actually not for other people, but for me to fill myself.

A Child's Laughter

Today, I saw a very very happy seance at a grocery shop.
After I finished shopping and went to an exit, I heard a child bright laughter outside of an entrance door. The boy seems about three years old was having fun with the automatic door, which opens to the inside of the shop as he close to it. He moves towards the door - try to touch, but the door get away from him. This very simple move of the door seems to give him some enthusiasm. He tired many times and every time when the door get away from him, he shrieked with laughter.
By hearing the happy laughter of the boy, I automatically smiled at him and his mother who stood watch from back of him. They seems to be a Chinese family. But no one cared the difference. Every one who heard his laugher gave him back a smile. There was nothing but a pure-happiness.
Happiness is born from laugh, and the purer the laugh the stronger the influence.

African Violet

My African violet (a plant) started blooming again.
This might be because of the morning sunlight which started to enter my room. African-violet doesn't like direct sunlight, but does like bright place. And from about two to three weeks ago, the morning sun stared to shine into my room that faces east. So from now on, the sun shines into my room longer and longer during the morning, and I could see the beautiful red flowers more and more. Only things I have to care is the direct sunlight and watering. (This plant is very strong. This is the first plant I kept alive for about a year and even blooming. I'm grad.)

Today's good things.

Today's good things.
1. I got 30/30 for the Math's assignment #3!
2. I saw three baby bunnies on Uvic campus. So cute!!
3. I'm now searching...
Finish.

Mind Control

You can't change other people's minds,
because you don't have the controller of their minds.
If you try to control them, they will register to it. It's the same as you. You surely will register if a person try to control you. But what's the example of controlling minds? It's the words like this, "You really have slow head, so you have to follow my advice. Otherwise you'll suffer" , or more direct method, violence. Sometimes, some people seem to succeed in grabbing other people's minds. But the minds they grabbed is the only a part of their actual mind. Human minds are originally much much larger and deeper than it appears on the surface. Never you can control the whole minds of others.
Only the controller you have is the mind of yours. And so, only the person you can change is you.

Clean Money

Money is one type of energy.
The energy of which usually called wealth. Most often, it takes the form of round metallic plate or drawn rectangle paper. But there are many other forms, such as check, gift certificate, credit card, or even some curtain goods. The energy can be described by the amount and the state. By state, I mean the cleanness of the energy. People knows the amount of energy money have because it's usually listed. But the state of energy -whether it's clean or tainted- is not known. But people eventually notices the state by knowing the background of the way the money is collected. For example, the money that is collected by a dirty trick is called dirty money, and the money collected by a clean way is called clean money.
And since the way to collect them is the way you planed, the state of money show the personality of yours. The money around you is the manifestation of your thoughts. So you should keep having clean thoughts for collecting money.

The Cause of Bullying

There is the kind of people who actually seems to have fun by bullying the weak.
Do you know why they feel joy? The answer would be this.
They bully the weak because by doing so, they feel superior and it helps to recover their empty pride.
Humans naturally have the tendency to be more cleaver, powerful and beautiful. Everyone has a pride to oneself. But when we see another person who is more cleaver, powerful or beautiful, we feel lost and it brakes our pride. Then from this point, to regain the pride, some of us chose to refine their selves and try to go higher, but some of us go easier way; show the weak to their disgust and get instant glory. However, the latter's glory never last more than a minute, and never actually level up themselves. Rather, it levels down themselves. The lack of this knowledge, keeps them to continue bullying.
But I'm sure that once they realized this fact, they will stop bullying and start refine themselves.

The Sound of Silence

There is a sound even in the dead silence.
In the very late night or early morning, after all the daily sounds such as the sounds from street, refrigerator, TV or radio are taken away, only there left is the very high pitch, metallic, severalfold sound -- the sound of the air. I call the sound as the sound of the air, because I can't find any source and it is heard in everywhere. ・・・May be this sound is the crushing sound of particles in the air. I only guess. But I like this sound.

Time

Time is an enigma.
When I predict there are lots of time, then later, I find out there aren't much left. But when I feel there aren't time, then later I find that there are still some.
Also, when I concentrate on something, time passes so fast, but when I'm in bored, time passes very slowly.
I thought the "speed" of time is uniform, but may be not. At least in my world (the world I am seeing through my mind) , the speed of time is absolutely not uniform. Perhaps there are two kinds of time; one is the time measured by clock and another is the 'time' measured by one's mind. Each may have it's own speed, and the difference between these speeds could be our perception towards time.

The Most Fearful Thing

For me, the most fearful thing in the world is my mind which can create terror.
When I terrified by something, it isn't actually by the thing I see. I feel terror because I look the thing as a terrible thing. If another person see the same thing, he/she may not feel terror. For example, I have a friend who likes snakes. So, for her, snakes are not as terrible animal than I feel. Contrary, I have a friend who doesn't like flying, but I really like it. I like flying and have a dream to fly in a glider. So, for me, flying is not as terrible act than her.
Every person has a different perception for fear and it's determined by one's mind itself. Therefore, there is not such thing like real terror in the outside world. Only your mind decides the thing as a terror.
So, now comes the most important idea; If you can change your mind, then all the fears you have can be eliminated. This is possible, because nobody other than you have the controller of your mind.

Films

We all have many films on our eyes.
The number of films is different by each person, and it reflects the level of consciousness of one's mind. The less the films you have, the more the truth you could see. Then the world appears more beautiful than before. You could see more beauty in flowers, trees, mountains, seas and skies. With these eyes, you also could see through other peoples minds, and you'll find that in every person's deep deep mind, there are diamonds shining beautifully.

Laughing

Do you laugh everyday?
Laughing is also very important for our lives. Without laughing, our lives become very cold and stiff. You know the image of heaven. When you image heaven, there are always smiles and laugh everywhere. The power of smile or laugh can even works in a very dark part of the human mind. Laughing is a main medicine to recover from unhappiness and spend a happy life. So, you must laugh at least once in a day, even you are in unhappiness.

Balancing Toy

Human mind could be compared to a balancing toy too.
If it goes to the right, then next it moves to the left. If it pushed by a big power, it try to balance by moving big.
Then this world could be liken to a space filledｌed with these balancing toys. Those balancing toys are placed close together in a big space, so the movement of each toy influences others. There could be difference in their size, color and its movement. If one moves too much, it could hurt others, or if one moves too small, then it might be collapsed by others.
I hope my movement isn't too big to harm neighboring toys nor too small to be crushed. And I also hope my movement influences others to a good direction.

Prayer for Peace

In these days, this small city, Victoria, is filled with cherry-blossoms.
They are so beautiful, so I can't help looking up them or photographing them.
We, humans, absolutely can't give happiness just by standing on a street, but the cherry blossums can do it so easily just by blooming the flowers.
For the trees itself, these flowers may only be one of the important tool of their vital activity, however when we see their blossoms we feel happy and restrul.
The flowers like cherry blossoms might be a manifestation of God's prayer for peace.

Look from the Other Side

It's so important to think from the other point of view.
If you can really look things from the other side, then it's not an exaggeration to say that all of your problems about relationships are solved. This is the key concept to not only for relationships between humans, but also countries and even other lives in this world.
Perhaps we are all living for this purpose, "To understand everything."

For Cold-calls

One very effective way to turn away cold-calls is to left the phone and ignore completely.
The person will cut off the call as soon as he/she notices there is no one to response on the other side. I always use this way to turn away those cold-calls. This is the very rude way, but the rudeness is, I assume, the same as the cold calls themselves.
...Oh, but even they are rude, it's a good act to be kind to them. So, how about playing a CD in front of the phone? It might be better than just ignore. Don't you think? I'll try this in the next time!

A New Cell-phone

Today, I got a new cell-phone by free of charge!
About a month ago, I got a letter from the company said I need to change the handset because it would stop working by the end of February due to a new net-work system. And they offered another phone for free for the people who have the model. So, I called the company and asked them to send me the new one. Then, today I got the new colour screen model, 'Sony Ericsson T237'!
I'm very grad for this replacement especially because the notice just came to me when I'm thinking about buying a new one. My old phone's battery charger became strange and I was just thinking about replacing the charger or buying a new one. I feel very lucky.